I'm writing this letter to you so I can get some things off of my chest. I'm done letting you win, and I need to get this out there once and for all so I can move on with my life.
See, you made my freshman year a living hell. You made me search for you everywhere I went so I could avoid you at all costs. I KNEW that any encounter would end in you making a comment about my weight. Whether it would be a smart little joke, or just flat out calling me fat, I knew it was coming.
Why? Why, out of all the people in that school, would you pick me to torture? I may never know the answer to that question, but I'm done asking myself.
I know you probably couldn't care less, and you probably haven't thought of me once since high school.
That's fine, I didn't expect for you to think of anyone other than yourself. I don't want you to feel badly; I know you never will, anyways. To be honest, I don't know what I want from you. All I want for me is to somehow find closure for the 14-year-old me that felt like a prisoner in her own body.
You made me hate myself. You helped turn me into this shell of a person; too scared to get any attention, so I always try to blend in now. When I first met you, we were in drama class, and I was in my element. I loved to stand out, and to be the center of attention. After you came along, I avoided attention at all costs, and I still do. I am now shy, quiet, and timid, thanks to you.
I get it, I was an easy target. Not only was I overweight, but I was outgoing, loud, and tried to always be the "funny" one. I hid behind my humor, but you saw right through that and tore me down. You ruined some of the best parts of me. I hope you got your satisfaction, and validated your own self-worth by destroying mine.
Did you know that I was starving myself? Did you know that if I slipped up and ate something, I went to the bathroom, stuck my fingers down my throat, and made myself throw up? No, of course, you didn't. Like I said, you only cared about yourself. Would things be different if you knew the struggles I was already going through? Probably not. That's just the kind of person you are.
I'm writing this letter to you to let you know, I'm taking away your power. I'm no longer going to let your words ring in my ears over and over again. I'm no longer going to picture your smirking face after you called me fat. I'm no longer going to think about you, period.
You were never anyone I cared for, so I am not going to allow you to take up any more of my time. No amount of money will make you a kind person, and that's something you will have to deal with one day.
I also want to have my moment in the spotlight now. This isn't about you anymore; it's my turn. I have lost over 100 lbs, and I am looking fantastic. I'm sure you would still find something negative to say about me, and that's fine. There will always be imperfections. Always. See, the point is, someone who is overweight can lose the weight, but you will always be ugly on the inside.
I hope this open letter helps some helpless kid (like I used to be) find some sort of hope. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Things WILL get better. It's true, high school never really ends, but your perspective will. One day you will not be concerned with the thoughts of others as much. You will find your true self, and you will shine so bright from the inside, that no one can ignore you.
I also hope this letter reaches someone who may be making someone else's life a living hell. Whether you are calling them ugly, fat, stupid, etc., you are not helping. How about try something new for a change, and be kind. Be compassionate to other humans, and maybe this world will become a better place. Any step in the right direction is a good start.
*Names have been changed so the jerk doesn't get any undeserved attention