珀斯妈妈把她爱爱的经验发到朋友圈!得到了10万多个赞!,最西澳微信公众号文章

话说珀斯有一位叫Constance Hall的妈妈，家里有4个孩子

每天打理4个孩子的吃喝拉撒,那叫一个痛苦！

Constance偶尔会发发博客,风格相当豪放!

自嘲自从养了4个孩子后,胸就下垂成这样了,腋毛也没空刮，测胸照是这样的

然而在昨天,她写了一篇关于如何在有四个孩子的情况下打炮的经验, 火遍了全澳洲。

We had "parent sex" yesterday.

昨天我们打了个“家长炮”。

You know what parent sex is, it's that 3.5 minutes you get in between changing nappies and making food,

你懂“家长炮”是咋回事的，就是你只能在换尿布和做饭之间的那3.5分钟空闲时间来

Where you notice that all of your kids are pretty distracted,

就是当你发现你的小孩都在忙着干别的事情的时候，

Where you realise it's been almost a month since you banged and are starting to feel like flat mates,

就是当你发现你跟你老公都一个月没嘿咻了，都差不多好像是室友关系了，

Where your husbands seduction consists of one finger pointing towards the bedroom and the other hand on his dick,

就是当你老公经常一手指着卧室，一手指着JJ的时候，

Where you position the bed to have one foot against the door because for a loud bunch of kids, yours can be pretty quiet when they're sneaking up on people,

就是当你把床摆在离门特别近的位置，这样在打炮的时候可以一只脚顶住门，为了防止你的孩子偷偷跑上来，

Where no matter how hot it is you chuck the doona on top of yourselves in case someone manages to barge through and catch mummy and daddy doing "yoga" in bed,

就是当你不管有多热，都得在身上盖条毯子，以防孩子们发现你们在做“瑜伽”，

Men are amazing and impressive creatures, by sheer determination, it's inspiring how one can manage to "finish" under such circumstances, us women, aren't always so easy.

男人真的是很奇妙的生物，他们能在这种情况下顺利“完成”，而对于女人而言，就没有那么简单了。